For the fifth time…
I’ve been natural for a little over six years now and I’m absolutely fed up. Again. Here’s the confessions of a natural who cannot braid to save her life, with or without tutorials.
This spring, I noticed that i now have heat damaged hair in the front. To those who know me, know that this is an absolute nightmare. My bang was the only part of my hair that looked…well good.
See that? Realizing the fact that I’m not apart of the baby hair brigade, I had to throw this head band on to add SOMETHING to this look. I can’t seem to get the back of my hair to look like much of anything. My curls come out chunky and my twist outs suck back there. Hell, they even suck on my bangs sometimes. Then I get so fed up that I end up geling all of my hair up into a very tiny puff due to my thin boring hair.
Ignoring the unfavorable mean mug, as you can see I had to straighten my hair to get my pony/puff to look somewhat presentable for leaving my bedroom- which is why, ladies and gents, I have heat damage.
Some days I consider big chopping, but I know it won’t be ideal for me at all. I will cry and never leave my house. But I know for a fact I never want to perm my hair again. The horror of scalp burns and spaghetti hair is just too much for me. So I’ve been stuck in my protective styling phase as of late.
But my entire point of writing this was, I thought being natural would be an amazing experience of getting to know my hair and getting in touch with my own culture, even making friends with other naturals. But it hasn’t..and that’s okay too.
Maybe I’ll keep trying in between braids, or maybe I’ll try something completely different, who knows. I’ve learned that my journey is just that, mine. I just want healthy hair from this point on and whatever skills I pick up along the way to getting healthy hair.